and it's turned into something entirely different now

Losing my computer seriously threw me off. I had been doing so well, writing at least something every day and then suddenly I couldn't write. Writing a paper by hand only works when you're writing out bits and parts, but not whole paragraphs with citations. I was still reading books on the way to and back from work and at work waiting for library patrons, but then came the lectorship crunch and I only got back into writing when I finally had my new computer in my hands. It's taken me two weeks to get back in the state of mind where I actually have analytical thoughts.

In the meantime, I am sleeping next to piles of paper and about 10 or 12 books that need to be petted and cited and cursed at. The page count is increasing ever so slowly and everything is all over the place. Instead of turning out perfect paragraphs, I'm writing bits and pieces of thoughts and wonder where I can insert them. One procrastination maneuver is of course filling in all the spots marked with red which need more citations and another is checking the citations in the books to see if the pages are correct.

Add to that the beautiful Vienna weather with its nightly thunderstorms and torrential rainfalls. My head hurts almost constantly, even though I really try to get a lot of water and sleep. One success, though: my diet doesn't completely consist of chocolate pudding and coca-cola yet. I'm limiting myself to two puddings and two cokes a day and I'm having plenty of vegetables and some meat to make sure my vitamins stay up-to-date.

On the whole, I feel somewhat strange. My work obligations are almost almost over (three day break while the graphic designer finishes up the catalogue) and I am spending my time in bed with my computer on my lap and the books around me. I haven't talked to some of my friends in ages and feel definitely recluseish.

Somehow my benign little Operation Sonnenstrahl has turned into D-Day (must get inspiration where it lies) and Band of Brothers helps with motivation: Gimme three da-ays and three ni-ights of hard fightin', and you will be relieved! I can't even say at what percentage the laser is, since I haven't done a page count and it would probably be very off with all the bits and pieces.

Monday is the last library visit - there are still citations that need checking! After all, I can't use third-hand citations, it's bad enough that I have plenty of second-hand citations in there already. That's the problem with doing a European topic, the literature is all over Europe and Vienna sadly doesn't have the greatest university library in history.

On the whole, though, I can already see various carrots dangling on the other side of the thesis - the master's degree for one and the prospect of spending my time as I wish without guilty feelings. Movies. Knitting. Books. It will be wonderful.

Gratuitous Scotland pictures all taken while on a weekend trip with the Edinburgh University Folk Society in Inveraray in October 2006.